Bringing Home The Bacon

The Pig Rises

It’s time.

Since the start of the year I’ve locked myself away in my room (intermittently, I’m not a psycho), slowly working out a script for a feature film. It’s ambitious, but if we weren’t doing something ambitious then why would people be interested? Ultimately, it’s achievable and ambitious – it’s achievatious. Yes, great start.

Over the last few years Muzzle The Pig has been slowly eking out some kind of puss-filled secretion that apparently has comedy somewhere within it’s ooze. We’ve now done a couple of fringe plays, a slew of sketches – with different comic tones, and of course our ongoing web series, All In The Method (you may have been pestered by it).  Naturally, some things have worked, some haven’t and it’s warming to know that the content we’re prepping for this year looks likely to be our best yet, look at me, building anticipation.  But sit back down, I’m not done.

 Do it

Everything we have done so far has been on a budget that equates to roughly one person’s weekly shop*, so now we want to see what we can achieve with something that raids the piggy banks, our feature.

*this is assuming you shop at Lidl

The Feature

The film’s working title is…….(drum roll)………(build it up some more so you’ll feel deflated when you do reach the end of these dots)……………..Leftovers………

…is a black-comedy road trip but with a twist. Naturally, by having a road trip film, it will allow us to explore as much that is beautiful, bizarre, odd or majestic across the UK. We’ve already begun piecing together a look book alongside budget plans and logistics.  The reason for being so tight-lipped about the project is that if I announced everything now, then you’ll probably never come back, similar to perhaps a really engaging novel. So I’m not going to give you all the pages just yet. Away from pretentious similes, the script is complete, albeit a third draft, but there’s plenty of work that can be done whilst the script is whittled down.

Through July I’m hoping to start rolling out some early concepts. There’ll be the usual social networking staples of a twitter account and facebook page. There’s a lot of things to be done, from promotional work to exploring funding options, and clearly I don’t intend to take this challenge up by myself. Therefore I’m looking for people who want to join and try to make something by starting with nothing. As you’ve should know by now, I don’t intend to wait for a lucky break to come, so I’m doing the next best thing and if you’re with that same mentality then don’t stop now, there’s more paragraphs of waffle below.







More than you could ever want

I want people who want to take the plunge as this is a big commitment. I want people who want this and by that I really mean it, a lot of people are very good at talking the talk in this business and then disappearing when the going starts to get to the point of them having to lift a finger. I’m not asking for your life, I asked that once before from a samurai and forgot how literal they take things. I’m asking for plenty of enthusiasm, resourcefulness and just solid contact. There. Nice and dramatic, only thing its missing is some stirring music in the background (I’ll leave you to find some to accompany your reading).

I’d much prefer people who are going to throw themselves into the project and learn, rather than people who are experienced but treat the project as a roll of ultra thin toilet paper. There will be long days, days where we have to go over our projected schedule or solve more problems than we had anticipated and there will be obstacles we have to tweak our plans for, this is all part of filming. If you’re someone who’s annoyed at your crew or cast when you realise the shoot is going to take three hours longer, than this isn’t for you. If you’re someone who looks at your phone and says, ‘I’ll respond to that in a few days’, this isn’t for you. If you’re someone who likes long walks and tantric sex, then drop me a line sometime, we should date.

If you’re interested in learning more about the project and the story we’re looking to tell, e-mail me at luke(at) Maybe you want to be involved in a specific sense, as an AD or a production designer, or perhaps you’re unsure of what role you’d like . Either way, get in touch and hopefully I’ll be arranging meetings very soon.

A promotional shoot targeting the main themes of the film is the first port of call and I’m sure once I’ve mapped out the stages needed for that, I’ll be seeking collaborators.






It’ll be exactly like this

They’ll also be a weekly video blog that I’ll be running, you may have watched that first in which case you’re currently having major Déjà vu as I cover similar points. Each week, the video blog will cover the progress of the film and also talk more in depth about some of the processes and thoughts behind the creation of the feature.  It’s my hope that the progress will be quite pleasing to follow as I start with just a laptop camera and a script and work my way up. There is obvious comic potential in this where I could get to week 28 and have gone slightly insane as I burn my script and dance around it like a tribal warrior.

In the meantime make sure you watch our new episode of All In The Method that is now on YouTube and you look out for the next episode being released shortly. Not only that, we also have the beginnings of Rich and I’s sketch show, so there’s plenty of reasons to let your boss know that you can’t come into work, ever again.

luke(at) or reach me on twitter, @LKaile.